Teen Help

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Big Rock

New member

Hey guys, last week I discovered that my 13 year old son has been experimenting with light drugs and alcohol. After a very long week of heart to heart talks and belt to butt meetings he has come clean and admitted what has been going on and how and where he's been sneaking off to.

I take him on all my fishing and hunting trips and he occasionally goes to the gym with me when he doesn't have football practice. He told me last night that he wants to go to the gym more. I've been looking for workouts for teens and I'm not finding much. Can anyone please point me in the right direction? Any advice is greatly appreciated. He's 13 years old, 5'10 and 165lbs. Thanks guys.

 
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icdeadlifters

Guest

This might not be a good topic.... Let a mod look before I post...

 
Dolf

Dolf

Moderator

Bodybuilding.com would be the place to look. Search teen male workouts. 

My advice is keep reps high (8-12 range), and weight light to moderate. Establish good form and habits. Include the big 3 (bb bench, squats, and deadlifts). Include explosive exercises like box jumps, tire flipping, sprints, the sled, and the ropes.

Good luck brother, and get that boy addicted to the iron rather than drugs and alcohol. 

 
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Frankie-knuckels

Guest

Allow me to suggest an excellent program for your son who for his age is a pretty big boy at 13 years old Starting Strength by Coach Mark Rippitoe . In this program he will learn the big 4 lifts Squats , OHP , Bench , and Deadlifts also the powerclean once he advances in the program . You can purchase the book which will teach you and him all the lifts along with the basic programming and they also have a website and a forum that will guide through the whole process . Oh they also have a Facebook public group page who's members are very supportive and you can get advice both on the page and the forum from Starting Strength coaches . At his age and a beginner his strength gains would be out the roof with this program IMO he will create an excellent foundation with this program.

 
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Frankie-knuckels

Guest

Allow me to suggest an excellent program for your son who for his age is a pretty big boy at 13 years old Starting Strength by Coach Mark Rippitoe . In this program he will learn the big 4 lifts Squats , OHP , Bench , and Deadlifts also the powerclean once he advances in the program . You can purchase the book which will teach you and him all the lifts along with the basic programming and they also have a website and a forum that will guide through the whole process . Oh they also have a Facebook public group page who's members are very supportive and you can get advice both on the page and the forum from Starting Strength coaches . At his age and a beginner his strength gains would be out the roof with this program IMO he will create an excellent foundation with this program.

 
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JARHEAD2

Member

Sorry to hear bro,  but it happens no matter how hard a parent tries. While I agree the gym will help, my approach is much different. There's something going on inside when someone turns to experimenting. No matter what you do, if you don't attend to the root of the problem, it will eventually grow somewhere down the road! Find out if there's some depression or hurt going on & attend to it. Keep us updated!

 
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blastthru23

Moderator

X2. I  was thinking along these lines. When i was a young 11 years old i started experimenting with drugs. I was depressed, angry, and deeply hurt from physical and emotional abuse. I ended up pretty bad, and it took a long time to get right. Gotta get at the root, a pluck it out. There's something lurking below the surface.

 
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Big Rock

New member

I will do everything and anything possible to get inside of his head and address any issues that come up. My kids are my world and I'll do whatever it takes. Jarhead and Blastthru23, thank you for bringing this to my attention. Frankie-Knuckles...I will look into that book tonight, thank you. I've never really posted on here except for an introduction, I mostly read and try to educate myself on the subject matter but I feel like I know you guys from reading all of your posts. Thank you, all of you, for the advice.

 
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JARHEAD2

Member

I've sent you a friend requset. I'm nobod special, but I promise you that I have a lot of experience in this area & if there's anything I could do to help it would be an honor & privledge! Prayers for y'all!!

 
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blastthru23

Moderator

I'm curious if you're a single dad, with the mother out of the picture, or are you still together or co-parenting. I understand if you don't want to go there. Also, positive punishment  (belt to butt) might not be a good idea. I rebelled HARDCORE when i was old enough and big enough. A couple of my mom's many husbands got a run for their money, and did not end well for them. Not saying that will happen o n your end, but the rebel may come out with a vengeance if you're not careful. 

 
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Mister A

Guest

I was 5'9" 170 when I was 13. I was heavy into football and weightlifting, but I also didn't have any guidance at home or emotional support from my parents. My love for football and lifting couldn't stop the downward spiral.

It sounds like he's in the same boat as I was in, except he has a father who loves him and wants to help. I don't think there is a single more powerful influence in a boy's life than his father. Especially at that age.

Unfortunately, the world is a lot different than it was when you were growing up. This new global community we have online really prevents kids from getting a sense of what's real and what's fluffed up bullshit. Everybody wants to be like the people they see on social media. Kids don't realize they only see the highlight reel.

I think it's pretty simple: support the positive things he wants to do. If he wants to play football and work out, then build both of your lives around sharing that journey together. The more he begins to believe in himself via the belief you have in him, the more it'll drive him toward bettering himself. Teach him what happens to the kids who start slacking off in school and getting high. Teach him about delayed gratification. Teach him to be responsible for himself while supporting him every step of the way.

I'm not a father, but I know that if I would have a dad who did these things for me, I wouldn't have had to learn how to do it for myself in my mid-twenties after fucking my life up. Good luck.

 
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icdeadlifters

Guest

Bro.... I feel your pain and concerns. I have two kids.... There teens as you have. Both are national champions in tkd. Both are devoted to their mother. They keep with their school stuff. It's hard now days to raise a child as we were raised. I remember getting my ass handed to me for the smallest shit. Drugs are here.... America has lost that war. Now we as parents have to filter what's bad and what isn't. I was a baaaaaaad fuking kid I had serious charges at a young age and the judge gave me a choice.... Military or prison. I chose military. And it made me the man my daddy wanted. And it made me what I didn't want. The gym is a good choice to start discipline in a child of that age. Push weights instead of "dope". I pushed weights. As I grew bigger and bigger I got more active in the gym. See its hard to push our children away from drugs.... It's on t.v. radio, schools... Etc. Mainstream media even made it cool to use drugs now. Also you have a lot of members here who have overcome addiction to drugs only to improve their lifestyle. I didn't comment earlier cause I'm very cautious about kids with any type of narcotic... But I see you're needing advice on him staying away from dope and I commend you for that. They're our future and if we don't work on them...... Then who is gonna take care of our old ass????. 

 

Stay vigilant

Protect your children

I will help as much as I can...

 
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ramdisck

Member

I'd suggest getting him on the wrestling team.  it's a great way for boys to take out aggression and they will be busy enough there won't be time for booze.  Only time i got into trouble when i was younger was when i was off season.

 

 
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Big Rock

New member

To answer a few questions....I have been married to his mother for 25 years now. My daughter, who will be 20 next month is in nursing school and lives at home with us. Someone is always home. I work a 12 hour rotating shift so I am home a lot during the day. I schedule time off to take both kids fishing and hunting...I live in South Louisiana where the temperatures are mild and its always fishing season. My son, Lil Rock, has played football for the last 3 years and has excelled at it. My wife and I have attended every game he has ever played in, my parents have attended every game he has played in. I asked him today, I asked him why he tried weed, why did he take that pill and why he took that drink of vodka. His response was that all of his "friends" do it and he just wanted to see how it felt.

He is a big boy for his age and he's strong and fast. He has a lot of potential but I cannot go to school with him and be by his side 24/7 and the outside world with social media is overbearing I find. Thank you all again for your responses and caring. This is a very difficult time for my family, we are all stressed out about this.

 
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JARHEAD2

Member

We're here for you brother & I'm sure that you are a great parent & hope you didn't think anyone was suggesting otherwise.... as I said before, it happens no matter how hard a parent tries! The key is getting to the root of the problem before progression. 

 
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Big Rock

New member

No bro, I never for one second thought anyone was suggesting otherwise!! Legitimate questions were asked. No problem on my end.

 
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blastthru23

Moderator

I can say that Lil Rock has a caring dad. Peer pressure sucks. My ten year old daughter has succumbed to it as of late,  not drugs thankfully, just being "naughty". Being in California, you bet I'm afraid of drug use, it's everywhere here among the youngsters. Having started at 11 years old, I'm watchful. probably a little too noided out, but watchful nonetheless. 

At any rate, we're when u need us.

 
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