Cannot find a reason to train/I hate training

N

Newton223

New member
I don't know how many of these are genuine excuses so call me out of you think they are BS and its me just being lazy.

It's near May in the UK and the weather is winter weather but with more rain than usual.

Even though I'm going Boxing (Training) twice a week, I'm just really not enjoying it. TBH I only go to keep my weight in check (due to the Methadone)

I'm 38 now and waiting for serious spinal surgery........the 2nd one, and one bad twinge, and it puts me in a bad place.

In fact I have constant aching nerve pain down both legs 24 hours a day but I only notice it when I think about it. The only way I can describe it, is you know when your pinning and you get that not to painful pressure from the oil........well that but around 50% of each leg constantly..........this isn't what puts me out I have to just get on with that.

I last went the gym 2 weeks ago to do my chest and after 3 sets I thought "why are you doing this, you don't even like it, and the only reason you used to do it was to look more sexualy attractive" and now I'm not really bothered about that..........I have 3 kids and a history of crazy relationships and sexual antics, it just seems silly at my age. Like I said I have never ever enjoyed the gym, I just used it for sex appeal.

My drug use is under control.....the boxing and 250mg E10D Sustanon is to keep the Methadone shutdown and subsequent Methadone Face and Body away.

I have loads of juice here ready to do a course in a few months. I take 250mg Sustanon every 10 days to keep my Testosterone pretty much bang in the middle of normal because Opioids stop your Testosterone production. There's about 20 odd Sestonil and Aspen Sustanon 250mg amps, I've got 3 Hemi Rip 200, a Rohm Tren A 100, I don't know how many opened vials (although some of these have been there years and probably need binning) I have in my box and 5 packs of those all in one PCT's by PharmaQo.

I do wish I could find myself a reason to get weight training again and aim for an aesthetically pleasing body.

It's not like I even struggle to muscle mass on nor strip fat, especially if I've got 150mg Tren A (50mg EOD) and 500mg Sustanon.

What im getting from this is;

"I used to shape and make my body look good for other people, but now I'm older and couldn't give one fuck what people think there is just no reason for me to do an activity that I hate"

I've added the image just to show I'm in pretty average shape, yeah there's a little belly and love handles, but you can only see them with my shirt off, so yeah I still do care, but, I want to blend in rather than stick out now.

I don't do Social Media or any of that because I have never understood it one bit, so I don't do that weird thing women do a lot and post sexualy charged images, they say they get a kick from the attention.........sorry darlings it has nothing on the kick from a bag of good Gear.

8 weeks, 3 times a week, a quick course of Rip150/200 EOD and I would be ripped to shit with some extra muscle mass...............can't be arsed though


IMG_20240422_133217.jpg

Sorry for the massive huge post, I want to get to the gym, I want to find a target to aim towards, but it's pointless if I couldn't give a shite about the target.

Stuff like get to 10% BF or we are going to shoot your mum in the head would give me the drive to go but I cannot think of any such goal.
 
suppsforlife

suppsforlife

Well-known member
you hate boxing, weight lifting, or training altogether, regardless of which one?
For how long you've been training without taking weeks off? maybe you should switch up things.
also, you mentioned the weather, maybe this is what influences your mood/mentally? maybe a little trip to a sunny place will change something?
 
N

Newton223

New member
Used to love them, and I've been training as in competitive sports since 11 and have been a regular boxer (training) since 18. Some years me and friends have had maybe the cold dark month off or maybe only go once a week.

The past 5 years I've been getting sicker and sicker when it comes to energy and recovery and they don't know why.

I used to be at the gym high on IV heroin and Cocaine back in my using days this wasn't unormal, maybe unhealthy but I felt so good with life.

Each year my hyperhydrosis gets worse, damage to my spinal cord means it doesn't know or does know my core temperature but doesn't care causing me to sweat like a leaking hose in freezing whether, not sweat when it hot, just start to sweat for no reason. People say that's nothing, then I say go and stick a piss wet T shirt on, over that put a piss wet jumper on, then a piss wet hat and go for a walk in even 10oC for 30 mins............see who can manage it.

Thanks anyway mate, I reckon I should just put to bed this idea of being as active as I was 5 years ago, something has happened or something is happening in my body nobody has a clue about. It may of been me my fault like breaking my back in a car accident or it could be post viral fatique......fuck knows
 
N

Newton223

New member
Been thinking certain thoughts for a while now and if things carry on getting worse which they are I won't be waiting around for another 5 years
 
Gainz.

Gainz.

Well-known member
Newton223 said:
Been thinking certain thoughts for a while now and if things carry on getting worse which they are I won't be waiting around for another 5 years
Click to expand...

Jesus fuckin Christ... I'm so fucking sorry brother.
A few years ago I was struggling with the same thoughts. My ex destroyed my life and told everyone I knew that I was abusive... And people believe her. Because I was a junkie... It gave them a reason to believe her. Even though I don't even raise my voice to women... And I've never hit a woman... Ever... They believed her and it almost destroyed me. I came really close close to hitting that self delete button. A 2lb trigger pull close.
I'm so glad I didn't, because cut 3.5 years later and my life is as close to perfect as it gets.
You're situation is different... But not hopeless brother.
I know finding the energy to fight when you're at your lowest is extremely fuckin hard... But that's when it's needed the most.
My advice is to focus on your kids... No matter how you feel or what you're going through... They deserve to have their dad in their lives.
My kids and my fiancee are the reason I'm still here.
So if you won't fight for yourself... Fight for them. Be the man they can be proud of.
My son loves having a jacked dad. He brags about me all the time.
It fills me with such pride knowing my son has a dad he can look up to and brag about... Instead of that depressed junkie I was. It makes everything I went through worth it.
Also... Everyone knows my ex lies now.
 
Crazy Eddie

Crazy Eddie

Well-known member
May sound a little harsh, but stop going to the gym if you get zero pleasure out of it. And you say you could care less what people think of you now. Or what you look like.
Stop going.
From one father to another, focus on your kids man, if that’s an option.
My parents were not perfect by any means. My mother was a drug addict and substance abuser and bipolar crazy witch lol.
But when she was sober she was a good mother. She was just crazy as fuck. And my Father was a disconnected prick, who could give a fuck about anybody but himself.
Even though my mom was nuts. And we don’t have a relationship any more.I respected her more than my Father, because she tried and put forth an effort. And was there for me when my dad wasn’t.
Gainz is right.
They need their father.
Sometimes when I’m down on myself, focusing on someone else, takes my mind off myself and makes me forget about my problems.
Yes we need to deal with our problems, or trust me things get worse in the end if you just ignore shit.
Sometimes stepping away from something is perfectly health and normal. People quit stuff they once loved all the time.
I’ve quit many sports over the years, that at one time I was absolutely passionate about and thought I’d never stop doing.

Life is crazy man and most times we’re just trying to stay afloat and take it one day at a time.
I’ve been racing motocross for 20+ years. Granted I loved it from day one.
But there was a time where I didn’t want to race and I really wasn’t getting the joy I used to get out of riding. I stepped away from the sport for 8 years.
Only to pick it back up at 42 years old, and I can’t wait for the weekends to hit the track for a practice day or to race for the weekend.
Do what makes you feel right.
And stay sober. You tend to make better decisions when there isnt drugs involved.
Takes a bigger man to be sober and do the right thing.
 
Lee.the.Demi.Human

Lee.the.Demi.Human

Well-known member
I lack the drive to lift right now, eating better again. Getting my kcals in. I still want to I just don't have it in me to get in the killer mindset of bringing myself the pain.

I enjoy the hurt and the rush afterwards. I'm gonna try a couple scoops of pre and go for a 90 minute full body, maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow. But its coming.

For now I'm focusing on time with my children to try and heal myself mentally a little. I went from being a rake to a big tubby fucker over about a year. My little boy walked up to me with a toy light sabre, poked my guy and said "pop". I decided I wanted to look like Wolverine so my boy could be the lad whose Dad looked like a weapon. He was proud of me anyway but I wanted him to see real people could be extraordinary too. He doesn't know about the super soldier serum.

Change your routines, listen to new music, buy a new preworkout. Or if you hate it that bad, use it as punishment for all the shit you've done to yourself and put other people through.

Quittings easy, and doing the right thing is rarely easy.
 
N

Newton223

New member
Thanks for the input lads. I look back now on what I wrote as very cringe. It's not so much I don't like training rather it's the illness it causes days after. I went to my GP for bloods etc and he told me along with killing my Testosterone any Opioid will stop your body from also stop tge production of any endogenous endorphins, hence why exercising isn't having that feel good effect that you get as those receptors are saturated in Methadone (I should of known this). Anyway he had told me to slow down as my training hasn't really changed much in the 15 years he's been my GP.

He said I sound very depressed and apathetic right now and knows I'm not suicidal, those thoughts came out of anger and frustration but understands and isn't going to push tablets on me. Rather I have to cut out the HiiT and Boxing training in general and go swimming once or twice a week and the gym 3 times a week. At the gym only have 1 heavy day the other two do 5 sets in the 12/26 burnout range and take as many breaks as I want.

I went gym Friday night after the Dr's.....peer pressure threw the advice out of the window and although I was ill Saturday I did really enjoy being with the boys shouting screaming popping blood vessels.

I'm here today (Sunday) I'm just taking it easy doing light burnout sets.

I've not got a body goal yet other than I want to lose that beer belly and love handles.

Again I appreciate the input, especially straight to the point tough love ones. Methadone is being dropped by 10mg a month from Tuesday so realistically I will be clean this time next year.

Tah all
 
Gainz.

Gainz.

Well-known member
Lee.the.Demi.Human said:
For now I'm focusing on time with my children to try and heal myself mentally a little. I went from being a rake to a big tubby fucker over about a year. My little boy walked up to me with a toy light sabre, poked my guy and said "pop". I decided I wanted to look like Wolverine so my boy could be the lad whose Dad looked like a weapon. He was proud of me anyway but I wanted him to see real people could be extraordinary too. He doesn't know about the super soldier serum.
Click to expand...

Brother I felt this in my soul!!
My son literally just got done telling me how his friends don't believe I'm his dad because of how I look.
Out of all the compliments I've ever received... Nothing has ever made me feel so good!
It made everything I went through worth it.
He has a dad he can brag about and look up to.
I don't think there's anything better than that
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top